Sunday, June 17, 2007

More on the shot to LaGroin

OK, this story just keeps getting funnier and funnier, although it might not seem so to Redskins #1 draft pick LaRon Landry.

Landry suffered a groin injury to a "sensitive area" during a team-building (?) exercise after the last OTA. The Redskins were tight-lipped about the story, leaving us to get more details from PFT by way of ExtremeSkins.

A rumored version of the story is up on PFT. You have to scroll to UNCONFIRMED REPORT OF LANDRY'S PAINTBALL-TO-THE-BALLSACK INCIDENT posted at 10:14 a.m. on June 17, 2007. PFT doesn't provide permalinks to individual stories, so here's the fair use summary of the post:

"A guy who knows the person who owns the paintball park at which Redskins safety LaRon Landry got hit in LaDong with a tiny ball of paint says Landry had 'shot' one of his Redskins teammates, knocking him out of the game. Then, Landry walked up to the player, who was on the ground at the time, and proclaimed that he was going to finish him off, execution style.

"The teammate then raised his paintball gun and shot Landry point-blank in the crotch."

An earlier version of this story implied that Landry was an innocent bystander in the event. Guess not.

So, what was the dialog like between football players in a paint ball contest?
LANDRY: Oh, you mine, dawg. I'm gonna finish you execution style.

SHOOTER: You ain't my teammate yet, punk. Deal with THIS.


SHOOTER: Oh, you LaDonna now, bitch.
This story is destined to live forever in Redskin lore. Like the shooting mystery of an earlier day, I'm trying to figure out who shot LR? Shawn Springs? Not his style. Carlos Rogers? Lacks the killer instinct. Fred Smoot? Knows a thing or two about groins, but Fred is more into laughs. David Macklin? Jerametrius Butler? Don't know much about them. Hard to say. However, there is one d-back I would not want to diss under any circumstances. I don't want to call his name (same name as Puffy), or number (21), because I don't know that it was him. And, I wouldn't want this particular player (initials "ST") to hunt me down and give me a shot in the balls. And neither do you, brother. Because, you know, that stuff hurts.

Now, the questions are:

  • Did the activity bring the secondary together?
  • Does a simulated combat experience toughen a defense sorely lacking toughness?

  • Do LaRon's contract demands go up?

  • Does this count as rookie hazing?

  • Do we equate paint ball to dog fighting?

I looked for something on this story on Covering the Redskins. Covering doesn't post very often, so I've not added the site to my blogroll. I do check the site from time-to-time. He keeps his identity hidden, but writes with an insider's knowledge. Covering the Redskins was the first to put me on to Clinton Portis' comments about Michael Vick. A little research revealed the the site belongs to Bram Weinstein, who actually does cover the Redskins for the Snyder-owned 94.3/92.7/730 AM Radio. Covering is silent on this issue. If he comes up with anything, I'll link to it.

Photo: Donna Summer, found here.

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